I know there are those of you out there that are music snobs and won't dare condescend to listen to anything that isn't Moby or Radiohead or some such nonsense. If that's you, then this post ain't fer ya.

I heard a song on the way to work today that I hadn't heard before, and I play more than my fair share of country music. It's by a guy named Trent Tomlinson and it's called "Drunker than me."

It has replaced "Tequilla makes her clothes fall off" as the new best drinking song.

Here are the lyrics:

Well, lately I been noticin' a gradual escalation,
In your inability to handle your libation.
Go zero to sixty,
When you get on the whiskey.

Well, used to be a glass of wine an' you'd be fine all evenin'.
Now I'm the one who says: "We're done," an' tells us when we're leavin'.
Well, I miss the way that it was,
Can't even catch the good bars.

'Cause I keep worryin' about who's drivin' home,
Who's got the keys, who's got the 'phone.
Who'll pay the bill, call a cab.
I don't mean to make you mad,
But I don't want that responsibility,
An' I can't be with a woman, baby, who gets drunker than me.

Well, I never thought it'd come to this when I said: "Have another."
'Cause, baby, you turned into me, an' I became my mother.
Well, here's what I'm thinkin':
You're interferin' with my drinkin'.

I think I have an answer to our present situation,
'Cause you an' me out on the town's got built in limitations.
So let me make this clear:
Hey I'm the one who's drinkin' here.

'Cause I ain't worryin' about who's drivin' home,
Who's got the keys, who's got the 'phone.
Who'll pay the bill, call a cab.
I don't mean to make you mad,
But I don't want that responsibility,
An' I can't be with a woman, baby, who gets drunker than me.

I ain't tryin' to ruin your good time.
But I damn sure ain't lettin' yours ruin mine.
You ain't gonna ruin my good time, baby.

I keep worryin' about who's drivin' home,
Who's got the keys, who's got the 'phone.
Who'll pay the bill, call a cab.
I don't mean to make you mad,
But I don't want that responsibility,
An' I can't be with a woman, baby, who gets drunker than me.
No, I can't be with a woman, baby, who gets drunker than me, yeah.


It's not often a new song makes me smile, but I'm smiling today...