you've officially pissed me off now.

First it was your insults at my penis and your perception of how I currently perform in the bedroom, as well as my satisfaction (or more accurately) my dissatisfaction with the amount and power of my ejaculate.

Next came your efforts to get me to help the children of African Royalty circumvent tax laws or gangsters to obtain inheritances.

Then there were the sexually insusting ones hoping to embarrass you into buying their products. My personal favorite was one sent to me at work in which the subject said:

HEY PENCIL DICK!!

And all I'm thinking while hitting delete 587 times is "Jesus. How do they know?"

Then there was every subject line imagineable that all led to the same gray or green backdropped stupid-assed stock tip.

And of course there was your trend for sneaking by our spam filters by mis-spelling every naughty word, like ejacculatte.

BTW, Dooce spoke about this yesterday.

Of course, when I saw the word "ejacculatte," I immediately thought of a new and soon to be HORRIFICALLY unpopular offering from Starbucks.

Anyway, that's all changed now. My new least favorite SPAM message is this one (if you click on it, it's big enough to see what I'm talking about):


See, the name is some person's name (sort of), the subject is always two or three capital letters, and then the content of the email is some bullshitty nothing like this one, which says:

it, Redrick thought grimly. Himself. Why did he beg to come along so
dampness, erosion, all kinds of things like that."
irritation, nothing. A talking key. He turned away. A dreary expanse, like


I mean, what the fuck does this mean? I sort of understand the old spamming, at least to the point that you know that the 10% rule probably works and that SOMEONE is buying that shit or at least clicking on the links. I KNOW people have been scammed by the African royalty ones. But this doesn't have, do or sell anything, nor does it have any links.

So my question is, WTF?

Maybe this stuff will earn this week's FOAD (fuckoffanddie) Award from me.

Stay tuned...